Culver Community Church

Pastor Chris Sweeney

Sermon Notes

August 12, 2018

Matthew 18:12 – 35 Seeking and Reconciling the Lost (Part 1)

{vs 12-14} Jesus always loves to seal a teaching or thought with a solid example!  So let’s consider this (think about it) – In the illustration we have a single lost sheep which reminds us of Isaiah 53:6.  The thing that stands out the most in this is the contrast between the large number of sheep safe in the pen, and the one, individual lost sheep.  To our mind, this does not make sense for a professional shepherd – if he were to leave the ninety-nine, then they would all be at risk.  We like to think, to quote Star Trek that “the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one”.  This is sound logic but poor shepherding!  What this tells us is that Jesus, the Good Shepherd is concerned with each and every one of His sheep!  A hired man would not risk losing any of the flock just for one lost sheep.  However, when you consider the great love that Jesus has for those who are His (the ones He gave His life for) there is no distance too far that He would not go to save even one.  Last week we were taught, “See that you do not despise one of these little ones.”  God is not saying don’t despise my children (collectively) but rather don’t you dare mistreat any one of my kids!  We can see the same concern in large families – if a mother or father were to notice that one, just one of their five or six children was missing they would move heaven and earth to find that ONE!  Why, because they are not just one of a gaggle or one of a flock – they are (insert name here), the one unique individual that is loved individually.  This is the lesson to learn – Jesus loves each of His sheep individually and uniquely!  Be assured that He would never trade two, three, three thousand or three million for the one, unique loving relationship that He has with you!  Our loving heavenly Father “is not willing that any of these little ones should perish”.  This is why it has often been said "even if you were the only person in the entire world, Jesus would have died for you."  It is this individual love that causes rejoicing in Heaven, whenever any one sinner comes home!  God is not apathetic or displeased with those saved in the pen as the father in the story of the Prodigal Son declares (Luke 15:31b-32 NIV).  Let us do everything we can to help other lost sheep come home.  Let us be glad and join the celebration, not sitting outside jealous and pouting!  From this view of God’s great love, grace and forgiveness of the lost, Jesus moves on to ‘sheep to sheep’ relations and church discipline

{vs 15-17} First – I want to warn you about this, this process is critical to a healthy church body but it is very, very, very often misused!  This process is given by God and must be used as directed and with the right motivations!  The purpose is not to cause pain, to convict people of their sins or to air out dirty laundry - - - the purpose is stated clearly in verse 15, which is to win a brother or sister in Christ.  This term for win is a monetary idea in the Greek, literally meaning to gain.  What we see is that a fellow believer has become lost to the fellowship, to usefulness in Christ and is in need of help because of sin that they have fallen into – if we as loving brothers/sisters turn them from that sin, then we have gained them back for the church!  So many times, ‘Biblically literate people’ or misled believers use this process to prove themselves right, to revenge themselves against an offender or to beat someone who has fallen (and cannot get up) over the head with scripture.  If I, as your pastor hear about that kind of behavior then I will be coming to point out your fault, just between you and I!

The addition of “against you” to the text changes the purpose of this process.  I want you to see that this passage has gone from God seeking the lost, to believers seeking their lost brothers/sisters.  It may have been picked up from Peter’s question about forgiving those who sin “against me” (vs. 21 next time) or it may have been added to narrow the scope of the believer’s responsibility.  This is not an easy thing to do – few want to have their faults pointed out to them, even by a loving brother!  Most of us would rather this apply only to those who sin against us, or offend us.  It may be hard to find the courage to talk to someone caught in sin, but if that sin lands on our doorstep, somehow it’s a little easier!    This process is not meant to be a way of addressing people who offend you, but rather a way to safeguard the integrity and holiness of the fellowship.  God does not want His children or the local churches to be polluted with sin (Be holy for I am Holy – Leviticus 11:44-45, 1 Peter 1:16, Ephesians 1:4-5 & 5:3-4), and this is how members deal in love with those who need to be corrected. Galatians 6:1 commands us to gently restore the brother/sister caught in sin – again that is our goal here.  This process does not apply to those outside the church, only those who claim to be in Christ!  This is in part for the safety of the believers – we should not be going to meet heathen (unbelievers) all alone to tell them about their faults!  Another reason is that we cannot expect sinners to do anything other than sin – the untransformed life, remains in bondage to sin – a loving face-to-face with a Christian will not change that.  We cannot expect that those who have not made Jesus Lord of their life, will recognize or be bound by His words (scripture).

There is no good reason that any Christian should not be reconciled to God and to the fellowship.  If they are following God’s Word, abiding in Christ then their life will be ruled by sacrificial love, like the love of Christ, Himself.  This goes for believers also – friends, co-workers, family - - - especially couples (living under the covenant of marriage)!  If we live by the principle of God’s Word – forgiving one another, thinking better of each other than ourselves and obeying God’s commands (loving like God) – there is no relationship beyond reconciliation!  One person cannot do it all, but too many times, we demand that the other person is wrong, that they do all the changing and deny our own part in the problem.  It takes two for this process to work! In our relationship with God, He is perfect towards us in every way – we are always the source of the problem but He is willing to forgive and wait for us to return.  It is only when we hold on to sin, demanding our own way and break God’s heart that we will not be reconciled!  In human relationships, we must follow this process to make a bridge between the two separated parties, to allow them to see eye to eye and begin the healing process!

The next principle in the process that we see is that this is to be done in private – “just between the two of you.”  This is critical!  If you or I go and tell anyone else first, if we bring it to others “to ask for prayer” or to seek advice – anytime we stop along the way it shows that we have the wrong motivation.  The only person that you should discuss this with is God through prayer!  This process requires a direct, humble and loving approach – going brother to brother.  If we are really concerned about our brother, we won’t be sharing their business with others – that ruins the process.  When we share, we damage our brother and cause distance between the one who now knows about the sin.  Love covers over an offense, it does not gossip about it, causing trouble between even close friends (Proverbs 17:9)!  Aren’t you glad that God always begins by dealing with us on a one-on-one basis?  We wouldn’t want our sins on the bulletin board to be seen by everyone!  However, if we will not deal with an issue sometimes we lose this privilege of privacy.  Sometimes our sins will be brought out into the open in order to make us face them, to allow the sanitizing light of day to bear down upon them.

Unfortunately, many times, we will not be reconciled or won back in this first step – we refuse to see our fault or refuse to change.  In the light of this kind of refusal, we must move on to step two of the process – go “take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.'”  One or two other what?  This must be mature Christians, not your best friends, not people that you know will side with you and not people who will ignore God’s process here!  These others must be grounded believers who will also come in the right motivation, with the Godly goal of restoring this brother!  In Jewish (Godly jurisprudence) any matter must be witnessed by at least two, no one can be convicted on the basis of one person’s testimony.  Sometimes, a believer can be mistaken or prejudiced even though they honestly believe they see sin in the brother/sister’s life.  Bringing one or two others gives both individuals the chance to plead their case (tell it from their perspective) and these non-biased individuals can judge based on the Word of God.  (We will see more about this in verses 18-20)

If the brother/sister will still not be reconciled; after a one-on-one, and after the witnesses verify the sin then we move on to step three – “If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church.”  Each step is more serious, a progressively stricter way of dealing with the sin.  Now the gloves are off, the gentile, loving humble nature of addressing the brother has become more public and more direct.  This is when the fellowship of believers will try to apply positive peer pressure to bring repentance.  This should be done by bringing it to the church leadership (the elders), not going one by one to every person in the pews.  At this point the process becomes church discipline.  Here it is out of our hands as far as the responsibility goes, we may have to give witness to the issue but our participation is now that of one member of the fellowship at large. 

The leadership of the church will meet with this person, you and the witnesses and if they can will restore this brother/sister through God’s Word and counsel.  However, if it cannot be resolved they should address the whole congregation – again not in such a way as to ‘air dirty laundry’ or divide the church but to state the problem and give the decree that this person is to be excluded from fellowship.  Step four “if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.”  This is when an unrepentant sinning member of the church is cast out.  This is never done lightly, or with malice but in the hope that they will for a time be out of fellowship, out in the world (Satan’s power) and will turn from this sin and return.  Sadly, we often need to feel the full weight and consequences of our sin to relent.  Does that mean that you shun the person if you run into to them on the street?  No.  What it means is that they are not to be included in the worship services, Bible studies and in the day to day ‘body life’ of the believers.  Consider him/her as you would a non-believer – show God’s love, but do not be unequally yoked together with them (relationships, business dealings, parties, etc.).  This is to protect the fellowship – “A little leaven (sin) leavens the whole lump (church)” Galatians 5:9)!  This is the process that Paul describes in 1 Corinthians 5 – for a man sleeping with his own father’s wife!  However, when/if such a brother or sister returns, the church must be ready to receive them with open arms (2 Corinthians 2).  We must realize that the church treats notorious sinners (pagans & tax collectors) well – we will not put up with their sin in our midst, be we love them and share the gospel so that they may be saved.  After all, we were all sinners just like them once but God reconciled us to Himself through Christ!